Hey guys,
Sorry I haven’t blogged in a long time. It doesn’t mean that I haven’t had anything going on. I’ve actually been extremely busy, and I will have some exciting stuff coming your way soon (new record anyone? shhhh…it’s a secret).
In the meantime, I recently had the honor of interviewing a fellow songwriter who has influenced my own music more than just about anyone. Sara Groves. She’s was incredibly humble and transparent. Her new record comes out at midnight, and I encourage you to pick it up (it’s amazing). Head over to http://backseatwriter.wordpress.com/2009/11/16/sara-groves-honest-reflections-on-faith-songs-and-fireflies/ to read the interview.
Allow me to be honest for a few moments. Faith has always been something that’s come fairly easily for me. God has blessed me with the knowledge of his presence since I was very young, and when the times have come to make big decisions, God has always been right there to prompt my heart in the right direction. Whenever I’ve been faced with trials or loss or hurt, God has always been quick to step in and comfort me, and I am truly thankful for such a present Savior.
However, there are some days, some moments, when my heart is seized by tremendous doubt. Faith becomes something that I know in my head but cannot muster to feel in my heart. It’s a dark and lonely place, and in those moments all my hopes and goals seem infinitely far off, if not altogether unattainable. If I’m honest with myself, in those moments I’m even afraid to put my faith in God because to have faith means placing oneself in a position of vulnerability.
“What if I put all my trust in God, but he lets me down?”
Sometimes I find myself hesitant to pray for things because I’m afraid to be disappointed by God if my prayer isn’t answered. I don’t think I could stand being let down by God.
I am deeply comforted by the multitude of stories in the Bible in which our biblical heroes walk through their moments of great unbelief. Our “giants of the faith” were all 100% human and all of them at one point or another wrestled with fear and doubt. Everybody from Abraham to David, from Moses to Elijah. Every single one of Jesus disciples abandoned him at the end of his life.
But here’s the good news. God assures us- no, he promises us that he will never abandon us. Jesus promises that he hears and answers our prayers. Even after the disciples all ran out on Jesus, he returned to them and did not hold their panic against them.
A little bit of faith goes a long way. Jesus reassured us that the tiniest amount of faith is enough to see miracles. He didn’t tell the disciples that until they had giant-size faith, they were useless. Instead, he said that faith the size of a mustard seed can move mountains.
And still there is the problem of doubt and fear. At a certain point, the rubber meets the road, and even though we read and know all the promises of God in our heads, it’s our hearts that still can’t make the jump. And that’s where I finally understand what it means to have faith: to risk a broken heart and take God at his word, to be vulnerable.
That’s where my heart is tonight. I’m choosing to take God at his word, and trust him with my life, knowing that my heart will break if he doesn’t come through. I’m scraping together every bit of faith I have (which I’m pretty sure isn’t much bigger than a mustard seed) and placing all of it in God’s hands.
Even in typing these words down, my heart is filled again with the peaceful knowledge of God’s presence. He never leaves me.
The video pretty much speaks for itself. The “marshmallow test” is one of those classic illustrations of how we deal with temptation, but let me expand on it for just a moment. It seems no matter how old we get, the way we deal with the temptation of sin has little difference from the way 7-year-olds deal with resisting a marshmallow.
We know we’re not supposed to indulge ourselves, and even bigger than that, we know that there’s a reward at the end for doing the right thing. Most of the kids in the video decided from the outset that they were going to wait it out for the second marshmallow, but the more time dragged on, the more the sight and smell of it lured them in. Don’t we do the same exact thing with sin?
“I’m just going to hold it for a while.”
“I’m just going to smell it.”
“I’ll just hold it up to my lips.”
“Let me just nibble off a tiny piece; nobody will notice.”
Before long, our beautiful marshmallow ends up being a half-eaten gooey white blob. We try to kid ourselves into thinking that as long as we only go so far, we’ll still be able to enjoy the reward at the end, but if we take an honest step back, it’s evident that we’ve already messed everything up. Too many times, we then shrug our shoulders and say, “Oh, well. I might as well enjoy the marshmallow that I do have.” But by then, the disappointment of our failure keeps us from enjoying what was supposed to be a delicious treat.
So, now let’s pause everything and look at the promise that God makes us. Paul puts it this way in 2 Corinthians 5:17:
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!”
Jesus, through his sacrifice on the cross and his resurrection, hit the reset button on all our sin and shortcoming. Simply by the petition of God’s grace and the surrender of our lives to him, we can rest assured that when God looks at us, he doesn’t see the sin that has so tarnished our lives, he sees his perfect son who took our place. We’re no longer bound by the sin that used to hold us back; we’re an altogether new creation.
Why then do we still wrestle with sin? Why then do we still feel so weighed down by our failures? Make no mistake, the Bible does indeed make it clear to us that we are to move forward and strive for holiness in our lives. If you don’t believe me, just read the book of James. It’s kind of tough to swallow. So, how do we escape the snares that constantly trip us up? Let me offer a few suggestions:
Firstly, remember that this world we’re living in is still very much under the curse of sin. However, in Christ, we are no longer bound by that curse. We are called to be God’s Kingdom here on this very imperfect planet, and sometimes that seems near impossible. But don’t lose sight of the fact that there is a day coming when all will be made right. Christ will indeed return, and what a glorious hope that is. I suspect that if the kids in the video had only had a count-down clock to look at, they would have fared much better in resisting the marshmallow. So, don’t look at the temptation before you. Don’t look at the broken promises this world has to offer. Set your eyes upon the promise that Christ is coming again.
Secondly, in the mean time, don’t linger around temptation. We give ourselves way too much credit when we think that we’ll be just fine as long as we only go so far. Get away from temptation. Take proactive steps to steer clear of the things and places that bring on the heat. Be radical about it.
Thirdly, don’t go it alone. My favorite part of that video is the twin brothers. They started out by telling each other how good the marshmallow smelled, but later on, they were collectively silent. Together they didn’t even touch it. They waved their arms and kicked their legs together. Accountability goes a long way. Surround yourself with people who you can be honest with and who will ask you the tough questions. We’re not called to be Lone Rangers in our battles with sin; so don’t bother trying to do it that way.
Lastly, don’t allow your mistakes to keep you away from God. This is one of the most insidious lies that we buy into: that our sin is so bad that we can’t turn to God until we clean our act up. God is the very thing that we NEED. Run to him like a child to his loving parent. Don’t hide your shame with fig leaves. God’s grace covers us right where we fall.
I sat down today and compiled a list of wants. Some of them are serious, some of them are simple, and some of them are silly. Now that I’ve written them down, I can surrender it over to God and say, “Your will be done.” Life works out so much better that way.
I want to love like John 13:34-35
I want my faith to grow bigger than just a mustard seed
I want to marry a girl who reminds me of Christ
I want somebody to get saved at my wedding
I want to pay off my student loans and be debt free
I want to make a record with a great producer like John Leventhal or Daniel Lanois
I want to write a song with Sara Groves
I want to one day have a son to share my old G.I. Joe collection with
I want to be a great electric guitarist
I want a car I don’t have to worry about
I want to be known as a faithful friend
I want to stay hungry
I want to hear God say “well done, good and faithful servant”
I want to stop making my own plans and follow God’s
I want to stop hesitating when I hear God’s voice
I want to be generous
I want to follow Christ and not just admire him
I want Season 5 of Lost to start up already
I want to meet Bono and Rush Limbaugh
I want to live on the 1st floor so that I can get a real piano
I want to lengthen my attention span
I want to be able to grow a full beard one day
I want a kitchen in which to cook for my friends
I want to tour all six populated continents
I want to write songs that other people call “my song”
I just got back some photos from my show at Kairos Cafe Nights at Brentwood Baptist. The photos are by Joe Hendricks, a very talented Nashville photographer.
Click here if your viewing this in an email or reader and can’t see the photo gallery.
